Destruction, though an intimidating word but it rhymes, with and is antonym of the word construction. For several days I was thinking to update my blog with a good post, but lack of constructive and creative thoughts was restricting me. On today’s morning, when I was analyzing and inspecting the construction work going on my house I came with a very awkward yet interesting analogy between the construction of building and our own mind.
Have you ever felt broken inside, with a reason or without any reason?? Mood swings without any reason at regular intervals, getting depressed again and again and having just negative approach for everything. Sitting alone in your friend circle or avoiding contact with them pretending that you are lost somewhere else. With every new day there seemed no new beginning, and sunset seemed more prominent than sunrise. The things which used to give us happiness, sounds illogical and scary and we just wanted to run away from them. We all have definitely gone through a very bizarre period in our life where life lacks something, what we don’t know? But the essence of enjoyment and enthusiasm is lost and we just flail without any control on our mind and mood.
But for some new construction or building of a new monument, destruction is the first part. You can’t create something new on an existing thing. Even for a slight modification something has to be destruct first. The same concept is applied on thoughts also. In order to clear your perspective and make way for new thoughts, the old thoughts and prejudices has to be destructed. You have to erase or wipe incorrect pages of your life book even tear them apart so that a fresh page can be created to write a new story.
Now, the mode of destruction and the initial phase of construction are not very comfortable. Comparing it with construction of a building, first the view is damaged and there are broken pieces everywhere. Same in case of our mind, our old mindset and opinions are damaged and we have to change them. Everything in the home is scattered and nothing remains at its right place, same with us as our mood and thoughts are scattered and even our mind is not at its right place.
We have to adjust our sleeping and eating-place, similarly we have to adjust a lot when the destruction phase is running in our mind. When something is broken, the sounds are very annoying and cumbersome. When our heart is broken, the beautiful memories of happy moments of past are also very painful and disturbing. Soon we became frustrated blaming our decision for this construction phase and remembering how good our building used to look and how comfortable it was in past? But we know that we are helpless and we can never have our old building back.
Slowly, we recover and adjust to this construction phase. We start plotting for our new and better monument. We tear the old pages and start afresh, filling colors in the sketchbook of dreams. An optimistic person may be opting a mistake again, but its human nature. We can’t remain depressed and sad for long, either by our own willpower to rise again or for the sake of not reflecting a weak image and creating emotional drama everywhere. In the last phase of our construction phase, we tap our back or thank our destiny that after a short uncomfortable period (which never looks short when we are passing through it) the future is better and brings more happiness than what we thought in past this unfulfilled present will.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Aarakshan : movie review
Finally, I had watched one of the most awaited film of mine, ‘aarakshan’, yesterday. The promos were stunning, the topic is one of my favorite and something I had discussed the most and in depth. And when prakash jha is on the director’s chair, the expectations are always high. I thought to write a review for this movie after I had read some of its review. There is nothing much to hype about this film. The way it was marketed makes us curious about the content in the film. But the story is much different. But anyway it’s a great effort and this movie is a must watch.
Firstly, whatever you were watching in the promos comprises just a minor part of the film. 90% of the promos are taken from just first half hour of the film, the rest is completely different. Amitabh Bacchan, has played or I must say lived the character of prabhakar anand, principle of a college. Prabhakar gives utmost priorities to principles and ideals in his life. He helps poor and backward kids and give them free coaching. Even he has reserved some of the places in his college for backward institutions which give rise to a controversy as the college is private and there is no reservation policy in it.
People belonging to upper class oppose on his policy of giving entry to backward people but not to them even for trustee or management quota. Lots of people became his enemy but he remains firm to his values. He favors and helps Deepak kumar, a backward student, played by saif ali khan in every part of his academic life and even give him a part time job in college. Deepak is in a relation with his daughter poorvi, played be Deepika. Poorvi and Deepak are friend with Sushant, played by prateik babbar who is son of a rich man and trustee of college.
The scenario of enjoyable and peaceful college life suddenly changes when supreme court approves the decision of 27% reservation in government colleges. Sushant, who was sure of his admission to mass communication in a leading government college got disappointed and annoyed, when he failed to secure an admission. His fury and panic lead to differences between him and Deepak. There is a massive dialogue and argument between him and Deepak on the topic of reservation. Mithalesh Singh, played by Manoj Bajpayee is the vice principle, who runs 7 coaching classes and has partial and negative thoughts about backward people. He taunts Deepak for his success and comments on the lack of competitive spirit in backward people, and using reservation for an unfair advantage. The fights goes vehement with both sides exchanging lots of personal comments. Prabhakar, suspends sushant and had a hot discussion with Deepak, leading Deepak to separate his path and further breakup of Deepak and Poorvi.
This section comprises the first half hour of the film, which seems controversial and provoking to some extent, but if you wish that entire film is based on this then you are wrong. The rest 2 hours are based on Amitabh’s struggle against private coaching classes, his fight with Manoj and his inner power of sticking to his values. After resigning from college, due to conflict with mithlesh, Prabhakar’s home is illegally taken by Mithelesh to run his coaching. Prabhakar starts a free coaching for all the students, Deepak and Sushant also joins him, soon they have an army of lots of people giving their free services and the Mithlesh coaching business suffer and eventually collapse. The end of the film is diplomatic and has nothing to do with reservation. It ends with having free coaching classes in the college campus for poor students.
So this was the story. Now talking about reviews, firstly I don’t understand why the movie is named as aarakshan, as a major portion of the movie has nothing to do with it. May be it’s a good marketing strategy, or may be if Prakash has extended the reservation part. Political parties may have burned his creativity before the film has reached the theatres.
Prakash has kept an equal perspective for both parties. Dialogues, which are both entertaining and thought provoking are said for both parties. There are some minor characters and stories which gives light to major problems, like a bramhin whose father is peon, not getting admission in a college despite having 86% as some ST student has taken a general seat. It shows the faulty rule of reserved people having the right to take seats of general people which results in destroying the future of a bright talent. Sushant not getting admission due to reservation policy is another thing. The bank manager not getting promoted and his junior getting promoted due to reservation policy reveals another loop hole.
Manoj Vajpayee, saying that reservation policy would lead to flourishing of coaching classes further seems the most strong point. As general people have to join coaching to compete due to shortage of seats, and even in the reserved class, those having money would enjoy better luxuries and resources and would easily beat the poor ones. That’s a reality, Prabhakar’s wife saying that reservation is not the solution of injustice and if you want to give them a chance, then give them better resources in the beginning, good primary education so that they would be able to complete with general people is another great thing.
I would recommend all the people to go and watch this movie, as its both entertaining and thought provoking. You would have fun and will really enjoy the way this sensitive topic is dealt with covering all the essential issues. It’s a must watch movie.
Firstly, whatever you were watching in the promos comprises just a minor part of the film. 90% of the promos are taken from just first half hour of the film, the rest is completely different. Amitabh Bacchan, has played or I must say lived the character of prabhakar anand, principle of a college. Prabhakar gives utmost priorities to principles and ideals in his life. He helps poor and backward kids and give them free coaching. Even he has reserved some of the places in his college for backward institutions which give rise to a controversy as the college is private and there is no reservation policy in it.
People belonging to upper class oppose on his policy of giving entry to backward people but not to them even for trustee or management quota. Lots of people became his enemy but he remains firm to his values. He favors and helps Deepak kumar, a backward student, played by saif ali khan in every part of his academic life and even give him a part time job in college. Deepak is in a relation with his daughter poorvi, played be Deepika. Poorvi and Deepak are friend with Sushant, played by prateik babbar who is son of a rich man and trustee of college.
The scenario of enjoyable and peaceful college life suddenly changes when supreme court approves the decision of 27% reservation in government colleges. Sushant, who was sure of his admission to mass communication in a leading government college got disappointed and annoyed, when he failed to secure an admission. His fury and panic lead to differences between him and Deepak. There is a massive dialogue and argument between him and Deepak on the topic of reservation. Mithalesh Singh, played by Manoj Bajpayee is the vice principle, who runs 7 coaching classes and has partial and negative thoughts about backward people. He taunts Deepak for his success and comments on the lack of competitive spirit in backward people, and using reservation for an unfair advantage. The fights goes vehement with both sides exchanging lots of personal comments. Prabhakar, suspends sushant and had a hot discussion with Deepak, leading Deepak to separate his path and further breakup of Deepak and Poorvi.
This section comprises the first half hour of the film, which seems controversial and provoking to some extent, but if you wish that entire film is based on this then you are wrong. The rest 2 hours are based on Amitabh’s struggle against private coaching classes, his fight with Manoj and his inner power of sticking to his values. After resigning from college, due to conflict with mithlesh, Prabhakar’s home is illegally taken by Mithelesh to run his coaching. Prabhakar starts a free coaching for all the students, Deepak and Sushant also joins him, soon they have an army of lots of people giving their free services and the Mithlesh coaching business suffer and eventually collapse. The end of the film is diplomatic and has nothing to do with reservation. It ends with having free coaching classes in the college campus for poor students.
So this was the story. Now talking about reviews, firstly I don’t understand why the movie is named as aarakshan, as a major portion of the movie has nothing to do with it. May be it’s a good marketing strategy, or may be if Prakash has extended the reservation part. Political parties may have burned his creativity before the film has reached the theatres.
Prakash has kept an equal perspective for both parties. Dialogues, which are both entertaining and thought provoking are said for both parties. There are some minor characters and stories which gives light to major problems, like a bramhin whose father is peon, not getting admission in a college despite having 86% as some ST student has taken a general seat. It shows the faulty rule of reserved people having the right to take seats of general people which results in destroying the future of a bright talent. Sushant not getting admission due to reservation policy is another thing. The bank manager not getting promoted and his junior getting promoted due to reservation policy reveals another loop hole.
Manoj Vajpayee, saying that reservation policy would lead to flourishing of coaching classes further seems the most strong point. As general people have to join coaching to compete due to shortage of seats, and even in the reserved class, those having money would enjoy better luxuries and resources and would easily beat the poor ones. That’s a reality, Prabhakar’s wife saying that reservation is not the solution of injustice and if you want to give them a chance, then give them better resources in the beginning, good primary education so that they would be able to complete with general people is another great thing.
I would recommend all the people to go and watch this movie, as its both entertaining and thought provoking. You would have fun and will really enjoy the way this sensitive topic is dealt with covering all the essential issues. It’s a must watch movie.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
MY FIRST STORY.....
She dialed the number again with not much support from her mind. As the ring started, her heartbeat began to rise. Lots of thoughts were puzzling her, worries and tension; even the ring became less audible. Speculations and predictions, where he could possibly be, or why he was not attending the call. When the no response tone came, it seemed her heartbeat stopped. She got numb, stupefied. The events of recent started flashing in her mind like a film and she was suddenly filled with guilt and remorse.
“Why didn’t you answer my call?” He asked with a mixed feeling of agony and anger.
“Because I was busy due to some work,” She replied without any expression on her face.
“But you may have called back later when you were free, it can’t be as if you were busy through out the day and didn’t see my missed calls”. His frustration level was rising but not by that intensity as his grief was.
“ Ohh come on, why do you boys make issue of everything? I never understand, I don’t think it’s a big deal to not attend your call or call back. There is no sense in this entire thing. You just seek for reasons to fight with me!!” She seemed to be unaffected by his weak protest.
“All right, so are we meeting today evening at the restaurant?” Realizing all his efforts of complaining are in vain, he switched the topic.
“NO, not today and not in a restaurant, what would the people think, you have no concern for my image”. Suddenly she was back in the fighting mood.
“But you often hang out there with other boys, your old friends. Then what’s the problem in coming with me”. He replied in a tone, not sure whether he must speak or not.
“Why do you interfere in my life so much? You have no right to comment on what I do and with whom. Ohh gosh!!! That’s the problem with you boys, if a girl is talks sweetly to you; you misinterpret it and try to act as her protector cum bodyguard. Why do you try to impose yourself on me? You are not my boy friend!” Her expressions were enough to make him drop all his weapons.
“All right, thank you for reminding me about my position in your life. I would remember that”. Words were coming out from his mouth after much filtering from great sorrow.
“Now there is no need of doing any emotional drama. Old friends are always the first priority, you came later in my life, don’t expect my full attention. Can’t you just simply act like a friend”. She left in a haste, furious; and he remained there transfixed, watching helplessly his self respect and ego burning in the fire of negligence..
She was now on the verge of bursting into tears. She was reminded of all the times she avoided him with out any valid reason or sometimes without any reason. She realized his worth in her life and his contribution in making her life happy. He was there for her through thick and thin without any complain for bad treatment on her part. He endured her fury, negligence and orders without any complains. He neither protested nor did he ever leave her side no matter how rude she was to him at times. But she misinterpreted his silence as his weakness and helplessness. She started to build the perspective, that no matter what happened he would never leave her. He is like a mental slave and she could use him and treat him as she wanted. She started to make fun of his care for her and his devotion to their friendship.
She now realized the pain that he faced when she was not talking to him intentionally. She now realized his helplessness and frustration when she didn’t answer his calls or texts when she could have. She just wanted to apologize once, cry on his shoulder and beg for forgiveness but he had disappeared. There was no sign of him for the past 4 days. She had called more than 8 times.
She remembered how she used to cut his phone just to attend others’ calls or for some useless work. She, for the first time in life felt that he has now become a vital part in her life and without him she is incomplete. Tears now began to come to her eyes and they brought more pain as she realized how he wiped her tears and said that no matter what happen I will always be there with you to wipe your tears and if I can’t , I will cry with you. But now he was not there to cry with her and she was the only culprit.
She prayed to god to give her a chance to rectify all her mistakes. She decided now to answer his every call and every text. She would go with him wherever he wanted to take her. She wouldn’t do any work that would make him suffer and she would talk to him kindly giving him the respect and attention he deservers. She won’t hang up the phone abruptly and won’t be furious without any reason. Suddenly her phone rang and whole the world appeared to come alive when she saw his number flashing.
“Hello, I am sorry I wasn’t able to receive your calls.”
“Shut up, who do you think you are, where were you, how dare you disappear without informing me, can you imagine how worried I was! How can you boys imagine that, you take everything so lightly and carelessly!”?
“My cell had some technical problem and today it was in silent mode and I had some work so I wasn’t able to check my phone.”
“Don’t lie, it’s not possible that you didn’t check your phone even once! Couldn’t you just call back once to check whether I am all right or not? But why would you bother! What I am to you. I hate you! I won’t talk with you again!” She hung the phone in a fury.
He called back again. She was smiling now watching how she wrecked all the resolutions made just a few minutes back. She now knew what she had to do. It was the beginning of a new sweet and healthy relation.
“Why didn’t you answer my call?” He asked with a mixed feeling of agony and anger.
“Because I was busy due to some work,” She replied without any expression on her face.
“But you may have called back later when you were free, it can’t be as if you were busy through out the day and didn’t see my missed calls”. His frustration level was rising but not by that intensity as his grief was.
“ Ohh come on, why do you boys make issue of everything? I never understand, I don’t think it’s a big deal to not attend your call or call back. There is no sense in this entire thing. You just seek for reasons to fight with me!!” She seemed to be unaffected by his weak protest.
“All right, so are we meeting today evening at the restaurant?” Realizing all his efforts of complaining are in vain, he switched the topic.
“NO, not today and not in a restaurant, what would the people think, you have no concern for my image”. Suddenly she was back in the fighting mood.
“But you often hang out there with other boys, your old friends. Then what’s the problem in coming with me”. He replied in a tone, not sure whether he must speak or not.
“Why do you interfere in my life so much? You have no right to comment on what I do and with whom. Ohh gosh!!! That’s the problem with you boys, if a girl is talks sweetly to you; you misinterpret it and try to act as her protector cum bodyguard. Why do you try to impose yourself on me? You are not my boy friend!” Her expressions were enough to make him drop all his weapons.
“All right, thank you for reminding me about my position in your life. I would remember that”. Words were coming out from his mouth after much filtering from great sorrow.
“Now there is no need of doing any emotional drama. Old friends are always the first priority, you came later in my life, don’t expect my full attention. Can’t you just simply act like a friend”. She left in a haste, furious; and he remained there transfixed, watching helplessly his self respect and ego burning in the fire of negligence..
She was now on the verge of bursting into tears. She was reminded of all the times she avoided him with out any valid reason or sometimes without any reason. She realized his worth in her life and his contribution in making her life happy. He was there for her through thick and thin without any complain for bad treatment on her part. He endured her fury, negligence and orders without any complains. He neither protested nor did he ever leave her side no matter how rude she was to him at times. But she misinterpreted his silence as his weakness and helplessness. She started to build the perspective, that no matter what happened he would never leave her. He is like a mental slave and she could use him and treat him as she wanted. She started to make fun of his care for her and his devotion to their friendship.
She now realized the pain that he faced when she was not talking to him intentionally. She now realized his helplessness and frustration when she didn’t answer his calls or texts when she could have. She just wanted to apologize once, cry on his shoulder and beg for forgiveness but he had disappeared. There was no sign of him for the past 4 days. She had called more than 8 times.
She remembered how she used to cut his phone just to attend others’ calls or for some useless work. She, for the first time in life felt that he has now become a vital part in her life and without him she is incomplete. Tears now began to come to her eyes and they brought more pain as she realized how he wiped her tears and said that no matter what happen I will always be there with you to wipe your tears and if I can’t , I will cry with you. But now he was not there to cry with her and she was the only culprit.
She prayed to god to give her a chance to rectify all her mistakes. She decided now to answer his every call and every text. She would go with him wherever he wanted to take her. She wouldn’t do any work that would make him suffer and she would talk to him kindly giving him the respect and attention he deservers. She won’t hang up the phone abruptly and won’t be furious without any reason. Suddenly her phone rang and whole the world appeared to come alive when she saw his number flashing.
“Hello, I am sorry I wasn’t able to receive your calls.”
“Shut up, who do you think you are, where were you, how dare you disappear without informing me, can you imagine how worried I was! How can you boys imagine that, you take everything so lightly and carelessly!”?
“My cell had some technical problem and today it was in silent mode and I had some work so I wasn’t able to check my phone.”
“Don’t lie, it’s not possible that you didn’t check your phone even once! Couldn’t you just call back once to check whether I am all right or not? But why would you bother! What I am to you. I hate you! I won’t talk with you again!” She hung the phone in a fury.
He called back again. She was smiling now watching how she wrecked all the resolutions made just a few minutes back. She now knew what she had to do. It was the beginning of a new sweet and healthy relation.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
One child policy : solution of growing population ??
The census results are out, and the figure give the environmentalists the same shock as a student get when he sees his AIEEE rank. Both just pray to have got lesser number of digits than the actual ones. So we are 121 crores now. It seems huge, and we are chasing China very fast who is still on the top with 134 crores. So finally India will top at least one list. A list on which every countries wish to remain on the bottom side.
Now, we Indians have a tendency to waste all our energy and time on discussing only the problems. So I won’t get into the detail of the catastrophic effect of growing population. Lets discuss the solutions. Now the question arises, do we have any possible solution to almost nullify our growing population rate?
“ bacche 2 hi acche”, the quote which I guess must have formed before lalu prasad came into the politics is still well known, but has it been implemented effectively. People back in 80s wouldn’t have thought that in future, even the basic commodities would become out of reach of normal person. Price rise will broke even the records of DU cut offs. Its ok, they were lacking the sources of entertainment that we enjoy but it I never understand why they started factories of children. 7 to 10 children a family, thank god now people plan children according to their annual income and budget.
So is the one child policy the correct solution. China has implemented it, and to a good extent it has controlled its population very well. It also has enough land to accommodate all. Now leave all this statistics and imagine your life without your brothers and sisters. No one to fight with, no one to compete with, no one to hug in your success, no one to give your shoulders to cry on.
Every child whether animals or human first compete with their siblings to grow stronger and learn. We all had competed with our brothers and sisters in everything. Every piece of chocolate, every toy, clothes and the comparison of every performance in school. The achievements of our brothers and sisters always compelled us to work hard. The mistakes of our elder siblings told us what not to do and we always guided the younger ones. We never had to search someone to play cards, crickets or other outdoor games. There is no fun in eating the pizza alone, you must have your siblings to fight for every single piece, and the feeling of victory gives the real taste.
Alone child will never get full time and support of parents. He will felt alone and soon would come under obsession. Either he will become anti social or a computer geek. He’ll have no one to compete with, thus no sense of competition would generate in his mind. Neither he will have any one to give him emotional stability. So we may improve statistically but our social structure will collapse. We are already suffering from single-family problems now that family would loose its complete entity too. Guess better education and spreading more awareness and restrictions for the two child plans must be continued. We don’t want to have obsessed army of large old peoples after 50 years.
Now, we Indians have a tendency to waste all our energy and time on discussing only the problems. So I won’t get into the detail of the catastrophic effect of growing population. Lets discuss the solutions. Now the question arises, do we have any possible solution to almost nullify our growing population rate?
“ bacche 2 hi acche”, the quote which I guess must have formed before lalu prasad came into the politics is still well known, but has it been implemented effectively. People back in 80s wouldn’t have thought that in future, even the basic commodities would become out of reach of normal person. Price rise will broke even the records of DU cut offs. Its ok, they were lacking the sources of entertainment that we enjoy but it I never understand why they started factories of children. 7 to 10 children a family, thank god now people plan children according to their annual income and budget.
So is the one child policy the correct solution. China has implemented it, and to a good extent it has controlled its population very well. It also has enough land to accommodate all. Now leave all this statistics and imagine your life without your brothers and sisters. No one to fight with, no one to compete with, no one to hug in your success, no one to give your shoulders to cry on.
Every child whether animals or human first compete with their siblings to grow stronger and learn. We all had competed with our brothers and sisters in everything. Every piece of chocolate, every toy, clothes and the comparison of every performance in school. The achievements of our brothers and sisters always compelled us to work hard. The mistakes of our elder siblings told us what not to do and we always guided the younger ones. We never had to search someone to play cards, crickets or other outdoor games. There is no fun in eating the pizza alone, you must have your siblings to fight for every single piece, and the feeling of victory gives the real taste.
Alone child will never get full time and support of parents. He will felt alone and soon would come under obsession. Either he will become anti social or a computer geek. He’ll have no one to compete with, thus no sense of competition would generate in his mind. Neither he will have any one to give him emotional stability. So we may improve statistically but our social structure will collapse. We are already suffering from single-family problems now that family would loose its complete entity too. Guess better education and spreading more awareness and restrictions for the two child plans must be continued. We don’t want to have obsessed army of large old peoples after 50 years.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Ride for us, race for them !!
Whenever I get down from a bus, I always pray to find a city bus. The reason being my childhood aversion from public transport, like city vans and tempos. Why I hate them, it’s not hard to guess. They are always overloaded and the situation inside these vans are like a third degree torture to war slaves. Often there are 5 people sitting on the seat where at most 3 can park and both the conductor and driver, if by some mean they can, are willing to place more people.
Many a times in emergency people had to stand between the spaces, some of them are drunk so the condition became further worse. Suffocation almost kills you and you just wish to jump from the moving van so that you can grasp some fresh air. Guess, its better to die from wounds than lack of air. Long before when I avoided public transport I often used to think that they must have some phenomenon of extra dimensions in these vans as almost triple the amount of people are sitting at a time on a van and sometimes the figure rise exponentially. 2 people escape and 10 more get in. I had once traveled when the gear rod was between my both legs and I had to concentrate more than the driver to protect myself from a life threatening accident.
So this time too I didn’t get a city bus and I had to travel in a city van. I was daunted by the fact that I was the first one to get in. It means I may have to wait for more than half an hours if it didn’t get full completely. By full I mean 3 people along with the driver, 4 people on both seats and a conductor hanging on the gate and crying for money. I began to panic when only 3 people come after 5 minutes.
Just then I had started to analyze the driver and for the first time I started viewing things from his point of view. He was panicked and unstable. He was wandering around his van, calling loudly for the passengers. His eyes were in horror. Horror of other drivers, horror of impatient passengers, horror of city buses and horror of remaining behind in this everlasting race for survival. A race, which uses your blood as a fuel and it is converted into lots of sweatand little money.
He started the van with only 5 passengers in it and I was baffled. Baffled by his decision and baffled by my own inner paradox of thoughts. I always imagined this situation and rated it as impossible, sitting comfortably in a city van. But now here I was, sitting with as much space as 3 people use usually but I wasn’t happy. I was sympathetic towards the fellow whose eyes were still rolling 360 at the road to find another passenger. But he didn’t get any more. I just got down, finished my work and coming back to stand again sat in an overloaded van, suffocating, perspiring and abusing the van driver and thinking “ kash agle stop par sab utar jaye “ !!
Many a times in emergency people had to stand between the spaces, some of them are drunk so the condition became further worse. Suffocation almost kills you and you just wish to jump from the moving van so that you can grasp some fresh air. Guess, its better to die from wounds than lack of air. Long before when I avoided public transport I often used to think that they must have some phenomenon of extra dimensions in these vans as almost triple the amount of people are sitting at a time on a van and sometimes the figure rise exponentially. 2 people escape and 10 more get in. I had once traveled when the gear rod was between my both legs and I had to concentrate more than the driver to protect myself from a life threatening accident.
So this time too I didn’t get a city bus and I had to travel in a city van. I was daunted by the fact that I was the first one to get in. It means I may have to wait for more than half an hours if it didn’t get full completely. By full I mean 3 people along with the driver, 4 people on both seats and a conductor hanging on the gate and crying for money. I began to panic when only 3 people come after 5 minutes.
Just then I had started to analyze the driver and for the first time I started viewing things from his point of view. He was panicked and unstable. He was wandering around his van, calling loudly for the passengers. His eyes were in horror. Horror of other drivers, horror of impatient passengers, horror of city buses and horror of remaining behind in this everlasting race for survival. A race, which uses your blood as a fuel and it is converted into lots of sweatand little money.
He started the van with only 5 passengers in it and I was baffled. Baffled by his decision and baffled by my own inner paradox of thoughts. I always imagined this situation and rated it as impossible, sitting comfortably in a city van. But now here I was, sitting with as much space as 3 people use usually but I wasn’t happy. I was sympathetic towards the fellow whose eyes were still rolling 360 at the road to find another passenger. But he didn’t get any more. I just got down, finished my work and coming back to stand again sat in an overloaded van, suffocating, perspiring and abusing the van driver and thinking “ kash agle stop par sab utar jaye “ !!
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