Well back to the e-diary format . I just put that reservation post because while preparing for our exams .We often taunted people of reserved category that time by " sale tera to beena padhe hi ho jayega , tu kyu tension le raha hai " . A clear line between the unreserved and reserved category people was visible .Anyways I was shocked after my terminal exam result . The period after this is very comic and I can bet all of us goes through this . " agli exam to phod dunga " , " ab to har din 8 ghante kam se kam padhna hai " , " sala wo to rat(mug) ke acche number le aaya is baar aise padhunga ki sab dekhte rah jayenge " . It is the most comic and political human nature that we do not keep our own promises . Although we try our level best but it does not work for more than 3 days . We just come down to the same routine again .Same happened with me also . Meanwhile I was getting addicted to net . Beginning with 1 hour soon it reached to the peak of 10 hours daily . It was the most frustrating routine . Coaching hours were increased and I was constrained from 2:30 to 9:00 at coaching . It now seems unbelievable how I managed to sit for such a long hours . Rest of the time I just used to stick on net . I started sleeping daily at 3 or 4 am and still managed to get woke up at 6 am .
Occasionally that temporary euphoria came back during which i used to be regular and consistent with studies but eventually all ceased for at most 3 or 4 days . Studies didn't seem to be of any enjoyment as t hey were in 10 standard . It was just like getting trapped between school and coaching and net was the ultimate way of getting an escape . I often think that we all live that character in virtual world which we wish to live in the real world or whatever our hidden part is in the real world . Net is the ultimate way to emit out all of our frustration . But it was really proving to be a cage for me . As a drunkard or a smoker promises not to drink or smoke again but ultimately he can't resist . Same was happening with me in the case of net . Daily I tried my level best for not opening it but eventually I always failed to subdue . I still feel that overcoming net addiction is tougher than leaving smoking or drinking .This resulted in screwing half yearly too .During my physics paper I was on net till 4 am . Opened book and studied till 7 am ( yeah for the first time ) then also managed to get a little above half marks .
I used to watch some serials for teenagers at Disney channel and I often felt that the students outside India enjoys and develop much in this period than we do . We just often mug , mug and mug to get a good college in this period which is the pillar of our upcoming life . We are devoid of many interesting and influential things . We are burdened by our own dreams . We never innovate , initiate or introspect in this period and just continue to follow what the mob is doing . Still we brag that Indians are the brightest and most talented student but I don't think so . As per me Indians are just well trained and can work more and better like a donkey than any other contemporary student of other country does . Except a few all Indians are just doing job in some good company or institution . We are not the innovators rather just the followers . All the important inventions and experiments are being carried out in the western country . We do not have any contribution in any important innovation . All the new upcoming are taking place in the west . And those Indians which have done something belongs to the western organization and countries . Few days ago I have read a blog in which a guy was thanking god that Venkatraman Ramakrishnan doesn't cleared IIT JEE and went to USA and won the noble prize . This clearly reflects the image of Indian Education system . Why the government doesn't encourage research work ? Why all of our institution focus on good industrial interface rather than new research works and innovation ? No one of our youth even think about doing any kind of research work . And why will they think of it as neither our government nor any of the educational institute bother to provide any good opportunity or resources to them . Till the situation changes I think we should just keep on bragging " agar NASA aur microsoft ke saare indians wapas aa gaye to dekhna India kaha pahuch jayega "
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Agle Janam Mohe ST/SC Hi Kijo
First of all I want to clear all the readers belonging to the particular mentioned category that i have no intentions of offending them or their caste . I just want to express my views on this highly sensitive topic . As this continues to influence the shaping of our country and right now we are not developing up to over full potential due to this dirty politics.
I remembered when I was in 1st or 2nd standard some students of class were always called of and they were given some kind of scholarship . In later classes I got to know about that those students belong to some lower caste . But what does a lower caste means . I never understand this term . Their family were 10 times more richer than mine . Whatever it was my childhood so I didn't give much heed to this topic . Later when my sister was giving her medical entrance exam . I came to know about all this stuff . That some ( really some ? ) college seats were reserved for them . That time daily my sister and her other friends do vehement discussion on this so I build a strong -ve impression for reservation . When I reached some higher classes I started doing strong oppose to each and every topic related with reservation . When the OBC reservation bill in the IITs was passed and soon the strikes and strong opposition started all over the country . I also thought to do something so I wrote a poem. I was around 14 that time so immaturity is reflecting in this poem but anyways I still like it .
जब से लगा है आरक्षण
डरने लगे है हम हर क्षण
क्या होगा अब हमारा
नहीं दे पायेंगे परीक्षा दोबारा
नहीं होगा कभी हमारा सिलेक्शन
क्या होगा चयनित पिछड़ों का रिऐक्शन
विधाता को हम है धिक्कारते
काश हरिजन परिवार में पैदा होते
क्या मिला हमें ब्राह्मण बनकर
पिछड़ों से भी पीछे होकर
एक लड़का जिसका पिता हैं सामान्य गरीब किसान
उसका चयन नहीं अब आसान
किंतु पीडी दर पीडी एक पिछड़ा परिवार
चयनित होकर करता उनके सपने साकार
धन्य है हमारे वर्तमान नेता
काट रहें रोज एक फ़ीता
कर रहे है देश का विकास
सामाजिक समानता है एक बकवास
लेकिन हमारा भी दिन आयेगा
जब भविष्य में आरक्षण हमें दिया जायेगा ॥
I can't blame Ambedkar Sahab as he was right in his perspective and he decided the reservation only for ST and SC and only for 10 years . But later selfish politicians changed all and we are still paying for it for an indefinite period . Our country was just heeling from Gurjar's wounds whom for their selfish demands destroyed many government properties and due to which many passengers of indian railways have to face several problems . And today the Jat's stopped the water supply of Delhi for the same greed . It will encourage all the other castes also to do the same . Why don't the government just divide all the jobs and seats of colleges among diff castes . 5% for bramhins , 5 for Rajputs etc etc . Our present regional parties are demanding caste based census for the same greed . It will continue dividing society . We all are envy of our lower castes friend because they have to pay no college fee , they have to study less and still get into colleges . But how could a doctor treat patient well if he is not capable of ? How will a bridge of less capable engineer resist from being collapsing ? Those lower caste people which are in much strong position still seizes the right of those for whom the reservation is actually meant . They don't let them rise and neither they are willing to . Bach when I was 12 years old I have done a survey in one particular dalit area . One house was having a bike and DVD player still they told their monthly income 400rs per month .They thought they will be given further benefits by telling this wrong info. Just Imagine . They said that they wish their children should do the same work and they don't wish them to rise higher . For this problem creamy layer was introduced but look at its limit 4.5 lakh p.a. Almost all government employee are under it and they enjoys its benefit . At the present political scenario I don't see any hope to cure this problem . Only the educated youth of reserved category can solve it if they are willing to do . But I don't think they will do . Why one want to struck on his own leg with an axe . I don't want to born as an ST/SC because I want reservation benefits but I will still live as a general candidate and show the world that don't seize others rights and stop this dirty politics . Hats off to them which do this kinds of stuff .
I remembered when I was in 1st or 2nd standard some students of class were always called of and they were given some kind of scholarship . In later classes I got to know about that those students belong to some lower caste . But what does a lower caste means . I never understand this term . Their family were 10 times more richer than mine . Whatever it was my childhood so I didn't give much heed to this topic . Later when my sister was giving her medical entrance exam . I came to know about all this stuff . That some ( really some ? ) college seats were reserved for them . That time daily my sister and her other friends do vehement discussion on this so I build a strong -ve impression for reservation . When I reached some higher classes I started doing strong oppose to each and every topic related with reservation . When the OBC reservation bill in the IITs was passed and soon the strikes and strong opposition started all over the country . I also thought to do something so I wrote a poem. I was around 14 that time so immaturity is reflecting in this poem but anyways I still like it .
जब से लगा है आरक्षण
डरने लगे है हम हर क्षण
क्या होगा अब हमारा
नहीं दे पायेंगे परीक्षा दोबारा
नहीं होगा कभी हमारा सिलेक्शन
क्या होगा चयनित पिछड़ों का रिऐक्शन
विधाता को हम है धिक्कारते
काश हरिजन परिवार में पैदा होते
क्या मिला हमें ब्राह्मण बनकर
पिछड़ों से भी पीछे होकर
एक लड़का जिसका पिता हैं सामान्य गरीब किसान
उसका चयन नहीं अब आसान
किंतु पीडी दर पीडी एक पिछड़ा परिवार
चयनित होकर करता उनके सपने साकार
धन्य है हमारे वर्तमान नेता
काट रहें रोज एक फ़ीता
कर रहे है देश का विकास
सामाजिक समानता है एक बकवास
लेकिन हमारा भी दिन आयेगा
जब भविष्य में आरक्षण हमें दिया जायेगा ॥
I can't blame Ambedkar Sahab as he was right in his perspective and he decided the reservation only for ST and SC and only for 10 years . But later selfish politicians changed all and we are still paying for it for an indefinite period . Our country was just heeling from Gurjar's wounds whom for their selfish demands destroyed many government properties and due to which many passengers of indian railways have to face several problems . And today the Jat's stopped the water supply of Delhi for the same greed . It will encourage all the other castes also to do the same . Why don't the government just divide all the jobs and seats of colleges among diff castes . 5% for bramhins , 5 for Rajputs etc etc . Our present regional parties are demanding caste based census for the same greed . It will continue dividing society . We all are envy of our lower castes friend because they have to pay no college fee , they have to study less and still get into colleges . But how could a doctor treat patient well if he is not capable of ? How will a bridge of less capable engineer resist from being collapsing ? Those lower caste people which are in much strong position still seizes the right of those for whom the reservation is actually meant . They don't let them rise and neither they are willing to . Bach when I was 12 years old I have done a survey in one particular dalit area . One house was having a bike and DVD player still they told their monthly income 400rs per month .They thought they will be given further benefits by telling this wrong info. Just Imagine . They said that they wish their children should do the same work and they don't wish them to rise higher . For this problem creamy layer was introduced but look at its limit 4.5 lakh p.a. Almost all government employee are under it and they enjoys its benefit . At the present political scenario I don't see any hope to cure this problem . Only the educated youth of reserved category can solve it if they are willing to do . But I don't think they will do . Why one want to struck on his own leg with an axe . I don't want to born as an ST/SC because I want reservation benefits but I will still live as a general candidate and show the world that don't seize others rights and stop this dirty politics . Hats off to them which do this kinds of stuff .
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Getting in the Vicious Circle ......
Each year the class 10 results are declared . New hopes , new dreams and new challenges are inculcated in students. But many of us don't know what subject we should choose and we don't bother to do a carrier counseling . Most of us follow the same general trend - " usne ye liya hai to mein bhi wahi lunga " , " mere sabhi dost wo subject le rahe hai " , " gupta ji ke bete ne ye liya aur aaj wo acchi job par hai " . And some further aid are given by various coaching institutes mushrooming all over India in each and every city . After every result declaration days the newspapers are flooded with the ads of this coaching classes . The success stories of the candidates which have done something exceptional . The big articles of heads on " why to join their coaching " or " why their coaching is best " . And we also have the habit of watching only the shining and polished side . At that time we never bother to contemplate about our interest and learning potential . We never give any importance to our dreams or interest . We just wish to pursue what is best without analyzing that whether it will be best for us also or not . From 6th class onwards I was listening this kind of stanzas for me - " mayank sharma is brilliant wo jarur iit nikalega " . So without a second thought I took maths and 2 days after my last board exam I gave an entrance of a local coaching institute and as obvious I got selected ( every student got selected their I don't know why they do this kinds of formalities of entrance test ) ....
I still remember the first day in coaching . When our head was telling us how you have to kill yourself mentally for these 2 years so that you will be able to get into the IITs . He said " I gave you 4 days .. play how much cricket you want to play , read how much comics you want to read , enjoy how much you can enjoy " because after that all these things would be out of your life . We all were much enthusiastic and every student sitting their was dreaming himself as an Iitian . We all have fixed ranks for us and top 100 rank was common in these and we discarded the ranks below 1000 for us . Gradually the hectic schedule for the so called toughest examination of the world started . But their was a rumour that all the good faculties of our institution have left the building due to a clash between the head brothers and we would be getting new and inexperienced faculty . By that time I have already paid all the fees of rs. 30k for 2 years so I was trapped in the institution . Anyways we human always find some way of keeping us motivated and optimist . So all we thought that still we would be able to do it.But soon the problems started when I was suffering from a fever and has to quit the coaching . That time I realized the worst and most common mistake all of us commits . We wish to continue in the race but neither we are physically fit not mentally .
I left jogging, exercise and meditation to save quality time for study . But this greed let me pay much higher . When I became fit again I started going to the newly opened batch at morning . 20 min was my traveling time to coaching . I was attending morning classes of 9 to 12 and noon classes of 3 to 6 . I myself don't know how I managed to burn all my skin for going to coaching but at that time things were enthusiastic and charming always . All the students were full of energy . But soon I turn sick again and has to leave the coaching completely for 1 week . Due to which I never come in momentum . So I left my batch and joined the newly opened one . I daily planned various timetables . I tried to follow them sincerely but was not able to do it more than 2 or 3 days . I was getting crushed by the hectic coaching schedule . It was an era of day dreaming and these dreams always let you to stand again and again after every fall . When schools started the situation worsened . We have to reach school at 7:05 and get off from their at 12:45 . Then leave for coaching at 2:45 and come back home at 8:00 pm . So their was no time for self study . Time table changed daily . Plannings changed daily . But one thing that was common was dereliction in following them and inconsistency . But still some how I managed to get a good image in that 130+ student batch . At least I was having an identity among teachers and class .But I didn't pay any heed to school studies so that i got only 64% in terminals ( thx to English and computer i got 1st division otherwise pcm percentage was less than 60 ) . But it was also a general trend that time as all students have nearly the same results . I just told my father " Dad , I am preparing for competitive that's why performed poorly . But next time I will surely manage to score good in school exams too . " And he just nodded in consent . I was baffled that it was the same dad which rebuked me for getting less than 90% in 10th ( I got stuck at 88). The main thing of failing of a student I think is too much expectations and pressure from the parents . As they always wished their students should be on top but they never try to find the limits of their wards . Time was just flying with feathers . And I was getting behind with each and every second .
The head of our institution was an unsuccessful person both as a teacher and businessman (some says he taught some later topics very well but i don't knw about this as I have quit at that time ) . He used to take a 3 hour class in which the study time was only half hour . In remaining time , he used to brag how great he was , what business he had started and how fraud and futile are other coaching institutes . He keep threatening us that he will take a test from a certain book to separate students into classes ( obviously one which deserves iit preparation and one which doesn't ) . Due to this I completed that book 5 times but he never took that damn test and screwed all my time . Anyways I was enjoying studies that time to some extent . But soon I got much stressed and was finding some way to escape due to which I got net addicted ( net addiction is worse than alcohol addiction i think ) .
I still see the same trend is being followed . Each and every year same thing happens and it will be continued for sure . My juniors also become the victims of this though I have tried to save at least those which have contacted me for guidance . We don't wish to follow our heart . We wish to follow the trends giving maximum output whether it is suitable for us or not . These year also many iit aspirants will join coaching some deserving one , in fact lucky one i should say will shine and all others which have tried their best , worked hard and killed all their longings for 2 years will reach the state of oblivion . Talent would be crushed again and again in these country . We definitely need to change this cramming pattern otherwise the results would be catastrophic as the number of suicides are exponentially increasing in our country . I urge all the students to choose the field in which they can feel happy and fit . I remember when I told my dad my wish to take commerce but he said " commerce are taken by only those which do not get maths ". After 10th It is the time where you can enrich your personality which will be aiding you throughout your life . It is the time of gaining knowledge and excelling . But students just constrained themselves to books and study and their mental development process becomes static . Do not follow any general trend or be a part of this blind race . Eventually the world always notices the winners in spite how much deserving you were ,or how much efforts you have given . So follow your heart and you would definitely accelerate .
I hope it was not boring .....
I still remember the first day in coaching . When our head was telling us how you have to kill yourself mentally for these 2 years so that you will be able to get into the IITs . He said " I gave you 4 days .. play how much cricket you want to play , read how much comics you want to read , enjoy how much you can enjoy " because after that all these things would be out of your life . We all were much enthusiastic and every student sitting their was dreaming himself as an Iitian . We all have fixed ranks for us and top 100 rank was common in these and we discarded the ranks below 1000 for us . Gradually the hectic schedule for the so called toughest examination of the world started . But their was a rumour that all the good faculties of our institution have left the building due to a clash between the head brothers and we would be getting new and inexperienced faculty . By that time I have already paid all the fees of rs. 30k for 2 years so I was trapped in the institution . Anyways we human always find some way of keeping us motivated and optimist . So all we thought that still we would be able to do it.But soon the problems started when I was suffering from a fever and has to quit the coaching . That time I realized the worst and most common mistake all of us commits . We wish to continue in the race but neither we are physically fit not mentally .
I left jogging, exercise and meditation to save quality time for study . But this greed let me pay much higher . When I became fit again I started going to the newly opened batch at morning . 20 min was my traveling time to coaching . I was attending morning classes of 9 to 12 and noon classes of 3 to 6 . I myself don't know how I managed to burn all my skin for going to coaching but at that time things were enthusiastic and charming always . All the students were full of energy . But soon I turn sick again and has to leave the coaching completely for 1 week . Due to which I never come in momentum . So I left my batch and joined the newly opened one . I daily planned various timetables . I tried to follow them sincerely but was not able to do it more than 2 or 3 days . I was getting crushed by the hectic coaching schedule . It was an era of day dreaming and these dreams always let you to stand again and again after every fall . When schools started the situation worsened . We have to reach school at 7:05 and get off from their at 12:45 . Then leave for coaching at 2:45 and come back home at 8:00 pm . So their was no time for self study . Time table changed daily . Plannings changed daily . But one thing that was common was dereliction in following them and inconsistency . But still some how I managed to get a good image in that 130+ student batch . At least I was having an identity among teachers and class .But I didn't pay any heed to school studies so that i got only 64% in terminals ( thx to English and computer i got 1st division otherwise pcm percentage was less than 60 ) . But it was also a general trend that time as all students have nearly the same results . I just told my father " Dad , I am preparing for competitive that's why performed poorly . But next time I will surely manage to score good in school exams too . " And he just nodded in consent . I was baffled that it was the same dad which rebuked me for getting less than 90% in 10th ( I got stuck at 88). The main thing of failing of a student I think is too much expectations and pressure from the parents . As they always wished their students should be on top but they never try to find the limits of their wards . Time was just flying with feathers . And I was getting behind with each and every second .
The head of our institution was an unsuccessful person both as a teacher and businessman (some says he taught some later topics very well but i don't knw about this as I have quit at that time ) . He used to take a 3 hour class in which the study time was only half hour . In remaining time , he used to brag how great he was , what business he had started and how fraud and futile are other coaching institutes . He keep threatening us that he will take a test from a certain book to separate students into classes ( obviously one which deserves iit preparation and one which doesn't ) . Due to this I completed that book 5 times but he never took that damn test and screwed all my time . Anyways I was enjoying studies that time to some extent . But soon I got much stressed and was finding some way to escape due to which I got net addicted ( net addiction is worse than alcohol addiction i think ) .
I still see the same trend is being followed . Each and every year same thing happens and it will be continued for sure . My juniors also become the victims of this though I have tried to save at least those which have contacted me for guidance . We don't wish to follow our heart . We wish to follow the trends giving maximum output whether it is suitable for us or not . These year also many iit aspirants will join coaching some deserving one , in fact lucky one i should say will shine and all others which have tried their best , worked hard and killed all their longings for 2 years will reach the state of oblivion . Talent would be crushed again and again in these country . We definitely need to change this cramming pattern otherwise the results would be catastrophic as the number of suicides are exponentially increasing in our country . I urge all the students to choose the field in which they can feel happy and fit . I remember when I told my dad my wish to take commerce but he said " commerce are taken by only those which do not get maths ". After 10th It is the time where you can enrich your personality which will be aiding you throughout your life . It is the time of gaining knowledge and excelling . But students just constrained themselves to books and study and their mental development process becomes static . Do not follow any general trend or be a part of this blind race . Eventually the world always notices the winners in spite how much deserving you were ,or how much efforts you have given . So follow your heart and you would definitely accelerate .
I hope it was not boring .....
Thursday, June 10, 2010
An Intro .........
Finally I am starting to write blogs . It is one of the most tempting longing of mine since past 2 years but that time I had different views about what to write and their is a drastic change of situation from that time to present .I first started blogging back in year 2006 when I had created a blog names LIFE OF A COMMON MAN IN INDIA in which I had described how a common man suffers in his daily life, all his grievances for the system . But I soon left blogging don't know why probably due to my habit of procrastination . This bad habit always made me pay but still I am unable to get past it .
Anyways my main motto of blogging will be learning new words of English and then to apply them here so as to have a good command on them . Apart from this I want to enhance my writing abilities , to become more creative , to interact with outer world , and to share my views .Hitherto my english is not very good and I still fumbles in grammar but I hope I will improve by blogging . Anyways I am gonna use first few posts of mine more as an e-diary because I want to write all the up and downs in this past 3 years which has influenced my life and demeanour compare to any other era has done. Past 3 years have completely changed my perspective about things and the way I used to contemplate . Some may say that by doing this you are trapping your self into past . You should be free from past and look towards the future . But as per me no one in this world can be free from his past . Past always hovers our thought and mind . Daily when we go to bed we don't think about that we have to sleep now . All the happenings of the whole day just runs like a cinema in our mind and we think that " Alas ! i must have done this or I must have to say this to him/her " . I don't know about others but at least this kind of things happens with me . One should always keep his past in front of him so as to analyze his mistakes and rectify them for a better future .
I am writing these things of past cause I don't want to repeat those mistakes which I have already committed in future and I wish when I will see my blog after 10 years I would probably laugh that at a time in my life I had become so helpless so depressed that I was unable to sort out a good way for me . Life just seems to be a perpetual punishment which is going to wreck my soul throughout . Anyways I am able to get hold of this situation . But still I am not standing where I think I am suppose to stand .
Lastly I want to thank one of my former class mate who encouraged me to write this blog . Truly confessing I am writing blog to ape him . I think envy always led to progress if you know how to deal with it . You can go ahead either by making your opponent down or by increasing your level to go ahead of him .
Anyways my main motto of blogging will be learning new words of English and then to apply them here so as to have a good command on them . Apart from this I want to enhance my writing abilities , to become more creative , to interact with outer world , and to share my views .Hitherto my english is not very good and I still fumbles in grammar but I hope I will improve by blogging . Anyways I am gonna use first few posts of mine more as an e-diary because I want to write all the up and downs in this past 3 years which has influenced my life and demeanour compare to any other era has done. Past 3 years have completely changed my perspective about things and the way I used to contemplate . Some may say that by doing this you are trapping your self into past . You should be free from past and look towards the future . But as per me no one in this world can be free from his past . Past always hovers our thought and mind . Daily when we go to bed we don't think about that we have to sleep now . All the happenings of the whole day just runs like a cinema in our mind and we think that " Alas ! i must have done this or I must have to say this to him/her " . I don't know about others but at least this kind of things happens with me . One should always keep his past in front of him so as to analyze his mistakes and rectify them for a better future .
I am writing these things of past cause I don't want to repeat those mistakes which I have already committed in future and I wish when I will see my blog after 10 years I would probably laugh that at a time in my life I had become so helpless so depressed that I was unable to sort out a good way for me . Life just seems to be a perpetual punishment which is going to wreck my soul throughout . Anyways I am able to get hold of this situation . But still I am not standing where I think I am suppose to stand .
Lastly I want to thank one of my former class mate who encouraged me to write this blog . Truly confessing I am writing blog to ape him . I think envy always led to progress if you know how to deal with it . You can go ahead either by making your opponent down or by increasing your level to go ahead of him .
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)