3 Crushes of my Life ... !!!!

Now it may be surprising news for many. Mayank sharrma and crush… can it be possible ? But yes it is possible, after all I am a normal man and it’s more a proof of my normality. “So how many crushes you have till now “ .. One of the most recently encountered question in past month so finally I decided to laminate and decorate the answer in a post.. Even for the first time I am not sure whether to write it or not. But let me be like an open book. If ever my autobiography is published, media will get good masala.

Umm from where to start? Let me rewind a bit my life. Mayank Sharma…… considered the most sincere and talented student since entering in this mugging system.. So when did it started? I am no any heir of kapoor family to begin love life from 2nd or 3rd class. All of my school life has this bizarre coincidence of making pairs of topper. So I was linked with the second topper of my class till 5th class before actually knowing the meaning of couple or pair. But it was a good feeling. To be explicit, a status symbol. Out of many students you were chosen to link ur name with the second topper. (guess I was lucky, the second topper looked cute that time :P )

So lets start with the first crush. Ironically I came to know about the meaning of word crush in 12th class but it began in my life in most probably 6th class when I was 10 year.And the first thing which impressed me was her percentage in 5th class lolz … marks are just like salary in real life. The more you have the higher your brand value is. I was the wounded tiger that time but my TRP soon reached the height after topping the terminal exam and she was the second topper. So as per the custom and rituals it was mandatory to link my name with her. I was not stable initially but gradually the attraction increased. All maturing boys and girls parted the way that time and we didn’t use to talk with girls. So we can just give gazes and tough looks to each other. We spent 3 years during which I topped she was second topper but haven’t even spoke more than 3 times for 3 seconds. I thought daily to talk with her but couldn’t do it due to shyness and my arrogance.

When I left school, her memories still came with me but faded away soon. I met her two years after in a party. She came and initiated a gossip. I was little nervous and shy and also full of attitude. So I didn’t responded very well to her at that time. Later I felt very guilty and this gave birth to a poet inside me. So I am thankful to my first crush that she nourished my poetic ability my only distinguishable hobby so far. Time just blurred her thoughts in mine, but still she is like a laminated photo preserved in my mental recycle bin.

My second crush was very short. In fact it doesn’t even deserve the word crush but as I have to give a matching title with “ 3 mistakes of my life” I have to include it. Once again it was a girl ( :P has to clear nowadays). A tom boy like arrogant yet beautiful and pretty girl. She was very fierce and vehement and have little dogmatic character. Due to this dominating qualities my crush on her soon got vanished but ironically after I scored 60 out of 60 in 5 tests continuously she had a crush on me ( now you realized the value of marks in student life :P ). Later we both quitted the coaching and happyzz ending.

Now the final crush. A virtual one which just shook my real life that much hardly that I am still shuddering. It was an exceptional one with many vehement repercussions on me that changed an emotional mayank into complete rude rough beast. It started online it propagated shortly online and finally the climax ( ? ) happened online. It started back at those worthless net addiction days of mine at zapak site. She was one and half year elder than me but used to care about me a lot( at least it seemed so ). It was unique in the sense that she was the first girl I talked very frankly after my sister. So it was very fascinating stuff for me. Talking and interacting with girls as hitherto they were alien species for me. But the film ended in the interval with out any climax. Unexpected end , just some sound of broken glasses , a silent seclusion and inner transformation. She inculcated new sense of practicality and ruthlessness in me and I am grateful for this. Like a rainbow she appeared in life after storms and faded away soon. But I keep on reopening these wounds to accelerate me. 3 years back mayank sharma had written a poem which was his only worthy possession that time, very personal but now its futile so it is meant to be public.


लिखने बैठा हुँ पर कैसे बताऊँ क्या हो तुम
मेरे मन की अधूरी तमन्ना हो तुम
पहली बारिश के बाद मिट्टी की महक हो तुम
मरुस्थल में हरियाली का एकमात्र अंश हो तुम
पत्तो से फ़िसलती ओंस की बुंद हो तुम
हिमालय की स्वच्छ निर्म्ल श्वेत बर्फ़ हो तुम
सूर्यौदय की पहली किरण हो तुम
झरने से गिरते पानी क विहमंग द्र्श्य हो तुम
नववधू की खिलखिलाती मुस्कान हो तुम
मेरे जीवन की इकलौती गजल हो तुम
मेरे जीवन की इकलौती आशा हो तुम
मेरी कलम असमर्थ है बताने में की क्या हो तुम
कितना नादान हुँ में कितनी महान हो तुम
इतना निराला व्यक्तित्व होने के बावजुद मुझे दोस्त कहती हो तुम
मेरी यही फ़रियाद है खुदा से सदा खुश रहो तुम
मेरी यही दुआ है सदा तरक्की करो तुम
मेरी यही प्रार्थना है बुलन्दियों के शिखर को छुओ तुम
मेरी यही इबादत है कभी दुखी निराश न हो तुम
क्युंकि चाँदनी में चमकता श्वेत संगेमरमर हो तुम

wait.. it is not the ending :P ... we are Indians and if the ending is gloomy the film is flop. So picture abhi baki hai mere dost :P ..... I just counted the crush which ended. But this player hasn't yet hanged his boot and I haven't counted the running crushes ... CHEERS !!!