School always seemed awful to me since my childhood. I never wished to go there and gave all kinds of excuses to escape from it. But all of them were always in vain and I was forced to go to school. That time I always wished that some day I will get rid of this pathetic place. Long boring lectures, disgusting teachers which do not want to here anything from you, long sitting for hours which starts pain in butt. And my wish was finally granted.
With the arrival of new year, I made lots of resolution and even succeeded in following some of them. But with the start of pre board all my preparations and plans were scattered. At the time of pre board I realized that I'm not even 10% prepared and if continue with it I'll surely fail in board exams. After lots of mugging at the day before exam I managed to pass in all the subjects with boundary. The funny thing was that I didn't solve completely any of the question in maths. Due to partial marks just managed to get 36 marks but who cares if the highest was 44 . The completion of practical files and projects put a brake on our competitive preparation and after the exams I had only 18 days left.
As usual I wasted first few days in making plans but nothing serious. From 18th feb I realized that I have a long way to go. I hadn't yet touched 40% of chemistry, 60% of physics and 70% of maths. I was familiar with this condition because back in 10th standard I was in similar stage but still managed to get 88%. So I started preparing now at a serious level. After finishing maths syllabus once only 4 days were left for chemistry and I had to revise 9 chapters and 7 chapters I hadn't even seen their titles. As kabir had already mentioned to do our work of tomorrow at the present day due to fear of something disastrous. Same happened with me when my dad got seriously ill before my chemistry paper and he was admitted. I was panic and unstable but still continued to prepare and managed to do average in the paper.
Similarly all other papers went. There was a huge gap between English and maths paper and I wasted early days but managed to revise the complete syllabus. In each paper I was feared of completely screwing it due to very low confidence level but managed to do well due to very high over confidence level. But in maths paper the thing which I was scared from my childhood happened. I always finished my paper very early. In fact, in some papers I not even took half of the time allotted. I was stuck in a question and I attempted it 4 times until I completely solved it. It consumed a lot of time and I just got panic in the end screwing some crucial questions. This marks the beginning of a new era of mine. Paperfobia, in which in spite of knowing all the things I made lots of mistake and destroyed some golden chances.
I didn't studied anything for the computer paper and this was the best paper I had given, I was expecting 90+ in both computer and English and rest I left to god. At first not even 75% was being calculated in PCM. I was worried because it could disqualify me from some of the exams. I was very happy after my computer paper as no more school now. But my happiness turned into a great sorrow because just 2 hours after my computer paper I got ill. Now this was very disappointing but I thought it was temporary. Same as last year It ceased my beginning of competitive preparation. After some home treatment I was well after 5 days so I started preparing . As now with out any tension I managed to study for 15+ hours until I got ill again after 3 day. I was very much frustrated and annoyed but destiny and god were not willing to grant my wishes. I was not able to read my books and revision was completely ceased. Soon 12th April arrived the judgment day.
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